There is no healing "the past" 🛶

You may have heard it before in a therapy session—”how old do you feel right now?” or “when was the first time you remembering feeling this way?” or “I’m loving my little Jordan right now”. Whether we think of these as younger versions of ourselves, or more mature and ancient perspectives, these are all ways of relating to ourselves, and relating to ourselves is an act of creation, where we create a self out of something that doesn’t seem so obviously distinct upon close inspection. In other words, it’s a construct. It’s a way of dividing infinity; like Zeno’s Paradox, dividing infinity is infinitely unfinished because infinity lies between everything and everything is composed of it—at least if we divide it that way!

Here’s something I hope people remember: These frames don’t exist in the past. They’re only here and now, where you’re experiencing them. You’re creating them for a purpose—usually to love yourself or someone else in the present moment, so don’t forget to set them down when you’re done. If you’ve come to love and you’re being present, you got what you came for. Forget the frames and surrender. Or let them dissolve into the being-awareness that composes them. Or as they say, leave the boat at the river when you’re done crossing. Throw the toilet paper in the bowl when you’re done using it—doing so does not mean you’re not damn grateful that it was there for you when you needed it. 

Or, to slice infinity another way, the future you that you are now in 2025 existed in the past with that younger you.

Either way the point is that there is no separation between “yous”, not by time, not by causality, not by part. There’s only one world, one you, one moment. It’s here, it’s now, and it undeniably includes everything that’s ever happened. This means there’s no healing “the past”. There’s only loving right now. You can’t even turn away from loving right now—even that act is already loved. 

And if understanding what happened and offering your younger self compassion works for you, then fuck yeah! The way I see it, that’s you loving you, right now.

The only thing more difficult than becoming what you want to change into, is staying with what you’ve got. 🌓 

I think this almost universally applies, although it’s often very difficult to recognize.

With love, Jordan